Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Today I recieved a birthday card... my birthday is in 2 weeks, but
my friend sent it early... it was lovely..I felt special...and then......
I read the words on the front,

and I realised... I'M TURNING 60 !!!!!
I don't feel like a 60 year old...
How is a 60 year old supposed to feel ?? 
I've already lived 3 years past what my Father did...
I mean, I knew I'm turning 60...but
I'M TURNING 60 !!!

My first feeling was ANXIOUS... I mean... 60 is old...right?
I didn't feel like this when I turned 40 or even 50...
Then I got thinking....
I have almost lived 60 years... almost all of them great years..
sure there have been bumps along the way...
the bumps are what make me appreciate the great days even more.  :)
I've still got a lot to learn... like how to love myself and not be so
critical of ME...
BUT.....  I am still learning, and still growing...

So in honour of being " almost " are 60 things about me :

1...  I was born in the " best " decade...the 50's... I LOVE that I was

2.. I love Christmas... but have noticed more the last few years that
I love more of the simple things about it now.  I miss when my kids 
were wee, and it felt more exciting....

3.. I did childcare for over 35 years.. although there are days
when I miss it...I'm also learning to enjoy this stage of my life now.

4.. I'm shy....the dying inside kind of shy, although there are some
who don't believe it, I'm sure there are others who do

5.. I'm a family history / genealogy nerd.  I love it.
For my birthday I have asked for a DNA kit so I can hook
it up to my tree on ancestry, and hopefully find more family..
told you....nerd !!

6... Fall and Winter are my favourite seasons...I'm not weird
I just like cool better that extremely hot :0

7.. I love my blue eyes... I also loved my dark hair, although
its a lot more grey now

8..January is my least favourite just feels so
gloomy after Christmas.

9.. I came here to Canada as a Nanny..I was only
20 years old.... YIKES

10.. I went to England as Nanny.. I was only 
18 years old when I did that. DOUBLE YIKES !!

11..I've been a Homestay Mum for 14 years this coming March

12.. I have 4 kids ( but was pregnant 8 times ) 8 Grandchildren
and 2 Great Grands

13.. I'm impatient

14.. I'm quick to get angry, but also quick to calm down

15.. I'm stubborn

16.. I'm a plain cook

17.. Even though a plain cook, I like to have people over for dinner

18.. I think too much

19.. I get hurt easily

20..I love to laugh... I may even think some things are funny that you dont !!  hehe

21..I'm an introvert

22..I love reality shows

23.. I cry easily ( even at National Anthems )

24.. I love animals ( though we don't own any anymore )
25..I hate confrontation

26..Because of #25 I won't get into discussions about politics or religion
don't like to rock the boat per se... BUT.... that doesn't mean I don't feel deeply
about those subjects...

26..I love music...all kinds...well not rap, or heavy metal :)

27..I love that I can talk to my Granddaughter Ashley about almost anything.....
since she has got older, that's been the nice thing..

28..I love long walks

29.. I didn't care much for Disneyland ( sorry to those who love it )
I DID love seeing grandkids enjoy it though

30..I LOVED the Grand Canyon so much... it took my breath away

31..One of my favourite people is my Visiting Teacher... Thank you Linda
She comes EVERY month, and I always feel so at ease with her.

32.. I don't open up very easily

33.. Yet in some ways I'm an open book... it doesn't make sense to me either

34..Banff is one of most favourite places in the world, and its right
on my doorstep

35..Sometimes the way the world is going scares me...

36..I LOVE to read

37..I love seeing the big kids come to my door at Halloween
( I love the littles as well, but glad to see older ones still enjoy it )

38..I feel lonely... too much... need more friends I guess

39.. I love seeing / hearing / doing Acts of Kindness

40..I love my home... it always feels so comfortable here...
had other people tell me the same thing..makes me happy
that they feel like that here.

41..I love nature..mountains..water

42.. I hate creepy crawlies, especially spiders

43.. I don't have a garden because of #42

44..I like surprises ( if they are good )  :)

45..I love rain...especially big plops of rain that kiss my cheek when it falls

46..Love going to James Bond movies with my sweetie

47..Romantic comedies, action packed and christmas movies
are my favourite

48.. I am tooooo sensitive

49..I used to be a machinist, making army jackets and goonies

50..Pasta and seafood are my favourite foods

51..My FAMILY... what can I say ..I love them..I adore them

52..Junk food is my vice

53.. I dont like all the healthy stuff people quinoa..yuck

54..The people I would most like to meet if I could are
My dad, my McCulloch grandparents, and my dad's
mum...I have questions.   See #5... told you !!  hehe

55.. I have a bad habit of biting my nails

56.. I feel unlovable ( cept with Ken ) I think I annoy 
people, though I dont mean too

57..I need more confidence

58.. I don't like being tall

59..I love the land of my birth, but also love where I am..I have the
best of both worlds...

60... Good Grief.. in 2 weeks I'm going to be 60 !!!
 And Guess What ???   I'm going to LOVE it !!!!

Monday, October 26, 2015


Been thinking a lot these days... about life.. about '"stuff ", and
today when Ken and I were in the van coming back from Costco,
I was talking to him about some memories..I realised I want
to write them down in my blog, but have left it too long that
now I'm having a hard time remembering them all.  haha

When I lived in Kelburn, we lived on the top floor of a tenement
building... I can remember when I had been out, how I would
run up the stairs as fast as I could...why ?  because there were
daddy long legs in the corners of the stairs, and I was petrified
that they would get me..haha
When I went up a flight of stairs there was a landing with a big
window and there were always a load of daddy long legs
floating up and down those windows... why did we have to live
on the top floor ??
There were a couple of landings too... oh I hated it  !!

I can also remember that my bedroom was the first one as you
came in the front door.  It was a big room, but so damp
and cold... freezing... but yet I have such fond memories of
my room there.

There was a long hallway ( at least it seemed long to me at that time )
At the end of the hallway was the living room door, but
before you came to it, the kitchen door was on the left hand side.
The kitchen had a big black ..I dont know what to call
was'nt a stove, but you could put the kettle on it to heat it up.
The other side of it was the fireplace in the living was
a coal fireplace... I wonder if they still have them in the homes there.

Also in the kitchen was a pulley... it would be up to the ceiling, but
with a rope that you loosened, you could bring it down to hang clothes on,
and would then pull it back up, so the clothes would be out of the way.
The clothes on it were washed and hung up to dry on it.

I told Ken that I was amazed  at being able to remember some little
details of my home there... maybe a sign that I'm getting older ??

Thursday, August 20, 2015

In Deep with the Book of Me.. August 2015 prompt

Happy Memories

Many of us have happy memories, We recall them
from time to time when we are day dreaming,
sharing a memory with others or perhaps we
trigger a memory by something else completely.

What are your top five happy memories ?

First... these will be in no real order, and there are other happy memories, but this is
what comes to my mind right now..right at this moment.. tomorrow if you
asked me, I could probably give five more different answers. :)

Memory number 1....

My first Christmas in Canada.  I was a newlywed, We bought our tree and
decorated it together  We were making our own family was exciting.
I had never seen so many presents under a tree before with MY name on them..
The boxes were all shapes and sizes, all wrapped in different coloured Christmas
paper... I couldn't wait to open them...and so I did !!  Oops !!
Very, very carefully I might add/ and taped them back up so carefully as well :)
Because I was new to Canada, Ken had got me winter boots ( I had none )
and a new jacket to keep me warm in the cold winters we get here.  I must admit,..
that Christmas was such a happy time.
P.S.  I have never opened up any presents before Christmas again...the surprise
on Christmas day is much better

Memory number 2...

I think I was married about 6 months when I went back to Scotland.
I remember showing up at my dad and mum's ( Bridie ) door.....
I don't remember the circumstances as to why I stayed there one night ( I
was actually staying at my friend Jean's house )... what I do remember was,
I had gone to bed, and there was a soft knock on the door... it was my dad.
He came and sat on the bed to talk to me.  we talked and talked, and then before
he left the room, he tucked me in and kissed my forehead.  It made me feel warm
it made me feel so happy... it was just a small gesture, but made me feel
so, so happy.  I still smile when I think about it.
I love and miss my dad....

Memory number 3...

There was a bunch of us women at church who once a month or so
would go out to eat, but also get into some mischief... nothing bad...
Having grown up in Scotland I had never gone out to toilet paper anyone's house.
It really was good clean fun.. :)
Well here we were...all these women...we went to another friend's home.
Let the FUN begin. Sneaking around and throwing toilet paper up over
trees and bushes.  We were so quiet, yet giggly.
And then the one friend ( Wendy ) I dont remember the exact details..but I think
it was pots and pans she went to hang on their door or the mailbox..when we heard a HEY !!!
He had seen her shadow....I have never seen anyone run so fast.. jump into
the van ( she was the driver ) and drive off, just as he came out the door.
Maybe you had to be there...but we could NOT stop laughing !!
Funny memory  :)

Memory number 4...

Ken is from Ontario,,, when we were married a year we decided to move
out West, but in 1986 we moved back to Ontario for just 2 years.
It was a hard move, it was hard to get back on our feet...things were tough.
Anyway... it was a summer day and our son Paul who was young at that time
was with Ken... they needed to get the bus to another town as Ken was getting a car rental or something. The bus they were waiting for must have broke down because they
were waiting for such a long time.
Even though Paul was young, he had a lot of Faith... Ken was getting tired
of waiting and was also getting impatient, when Paul said.." Dad...I'm
going to say a prayer that the bus will come" Ken just went along with it..well
Paul folded his arms, closed his eyes and as only a child can... just said a simple prayer
that they were tired and could a bus please come now... he said Amen looked up,
and over the hill was coming the bus.  When Ken explained the story to me
later., I don't know..I just felt warm...proud... and even now its such a
happy memory that we still talk about.

Memory number 5...

When I left High School I went to work at a place called Wovenair..
( I wonder if its still there )..  We made goonies ( dressing gowns ) and I remember
there were Army vests we made as well.
Always the radio would be playing loudly, and always different people
would be singing loudly to the songs that were playing, as we were working.
I was one of those...I still love music !!
Whenever I hear Rod Stewart;s " Maggie May ", it always brings me back to that
time of my life when I worked there.
Does music do that to you ?
I can remember where I was and what I was doing when I hear certain songs.

" Because when you stop and look around...this life is pretty amazing"

Thursday, August 6, 2015

In Deep with the Book of Me.. June 2015 Prompt

Flags :

... Do you identify yourself with a particular flag ?
.... Is it different to the country where you live ?
....Is it different to the country of your birth ?

I identify myself with a few flags...

The Lion Rampant
( Scotland )

The St Andrews 
( Scotland )

Scotland is where I was born, so of course these flags would be important to me/

Union Jack
( Britain )

Being part of Great Britain, this flag is also important.

Canadian Flag

Canada is where I now live...
I would identify myself now with the Canadian flag... thiis country has been good
to me. My children were born here... I have been accepted here.
Its a beautiful place to live... with its wide open spaces, its rivers, mountains
and prairies.     I love my Scotland, that could never change, but I also
love my Canada... the true North strong and free.....
I have made my home here..

My heart loves the land of my birth.. I miss it.. terribly at times.
I always get choked up when I hear Flower of Scotland
I feel the same when I hear Oh Canada...

Should auld acqaintance be forget, and never brought to mind
Should auld acqaintance be forgot , and days of auld lang syne

In Deep with the Book of Me... July 2015 Prompt

Bucket Lists

It is very 21st century to create a bucket list.

.. Do you have a bucket list ?
...Have you created a bucket list with a
particular purpose
...What sort of things are on your list
...Have you achieved any
Have you added to the list
What does the list mean to you ?

I  LOVE this prompt !!!
I'm a list maker anyway, so it only makes sense ( to me anyway ) that I would have
a bucket list.
I have a Bucket List board on Pinterest even...

When I was in my teens going to the USA was on my list of things I wanted to do.
When I was becoming a Nanny, deep down I hoped that I would get a job
in America, but I didnt. I was offered one in Toronto, Canada.
I knew that Canada was a neighbour to the USA, and so I took it.
Now I live in Canada, and have been to the States many times...I have'nt as yet
seen or been everywhere there that I wanted , but also some of my goals have changed as
to what I want to do or see.
Some things on my bucket list are  :
I would love to get tickets to see The Ellen Show

I would love to see the ball drop in Times Square, New York

I would love to see The Grand Canyon ( doing that this year )

I would love to see the Queen Mary  ( will also do that this Fall )

I want to send a message in a bottle.  I will do this, just not sure when yet..

I want to write a letter to myself and open it in 10 years.. I dont know
why I havent done this yet, but plan to do it soon.

I have started this, but have a long way to go.
We went to Johnstone's was beautiful,
and was awesome ( and tiring ) to do,,,,

I have lots more things on my list....

What does a list mean to me ?
It gives me something to plan...something to look forward to.
Its exciting adding to the list, but also exciting completing something.
Honestly, I think everyone should have one..
We all want different things in life... having
a list ( even if you think in your mind you cant achieve it ) still gives
you a purpose, and something to work towards... to prove
that you can do it !!!

Thursday, May 14, 2015

My Dad...

This is my Dad....
On May 14, 1988 he died...... 27 years ago.
So much has happened in that time  that I would have loved to share with him,
or ask his advice on... 27 years seems like a long time, and yet... I still remember it
like it was yesterday.
He wasn't perfect.. of course not.. but he was perfect for me.

This is him when he was a wee boy,

I remember shortly after I was married, I went back to Scotland on
holiday.  When I went to bed, there was a knock on
the bedroom door , and it was my dad, he
came in and sat on the edge of my bed and talked
to me, he then kissed the top of my head and tucked me in.
I felt like a wee girl again..I mean that in 
a good way..

My Dad and my step mum Bridie

He worked in the shipyards... I remember he actually saw
saw burn alive right in front of affected
him in a big way after that.

My Dad with my brother Andrew, my cousin Margaret and me....

I used to call my dad often.. I loved to hear his voice.
I would say that was one of the things after he died that I was
afraid of... not remembering his voice and what he sounded like....

My Mum, my Dad and me as a baby...

I regret not being able to go over for his funeral.  My passport had ran
out and I hadn't had it renewed yet.
I also wasn't a landed immigrant of Canada yet.
I called and asked the government if I could go over... they told me
that I could, but they wouldn't allow me back in Canada again..
It was hard for me... I cried so much... it hurt so much not being able to
go back to say my goodbyes..

My Dad and my Uncle George ( his brother )

What I hope is that he would be proud of me...
I hope he knew how much I loved him..

My Dad and I.....

He was only 57 years old when he passed away... he had had a lot
of heartache in that time..
I loved him...... I love him still
And I miss him so much... I'm not sad... I believe I will see him again,
and that is something to look forward to...
I love you Dad... to the moon and stars and back..

Archie Newman
March 1931 - May 1988

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Happy Mother's Day to my two Mum's

As its Mother's Day this coming Sunday, I have decided to write about my mum
and my step mum.....
I don't know why I feel nervous doing this, but here goes.

My Mum ( Patricia McCulloch ) was only 18 years old when she married my Dad..
3 months later she turned 19 years old.  I was born the following December.

Things about my mum that I am thankful for......

... For giving me birth
....For accepting the phone call when Ken called ( after he woke poor Anne up...
sorry Anne )
....For giving me more memories when she came to visit

.....For telling me she loved me

.....For telling my siblings about me, so that I could also be in touch with them
This is just 2 of them..I'm in the middle  :)

.....For taking me to Dundee so I could meet that side of my famuly

A Letter to my Mum :

Dear mum, ever since I had been young, I had always wondered about you..I
am so grateful that I was able to find you.
Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I could ever meet you,
But..... I did !!!
Everyone told me that I look like you, although I cant see it
too much.. Tricia for sure looks like you.
You told me that you had always wondered about us as well.
I hope you weren't disappointed when we met..
Its going to be Mother's day this coming Sunday,
you're not here anymore for me to call and wish you a 
Happy Mother's Day, so I am telling you here instead.
I hope you  can feel my love from Heaven.
I wish you were here so I could talk to you about things
in my own life.
I wish so much
Sending big hugs to you
Happy Mother's day
I Love You

My Step Mum was Bridget Keyes , but she was called Bridie.
I called her Mum....

Things I am Thankful for :

.....I am thankful she chose to take on a family that wasn't her own
.....for her love
.....for her acceptance

A letter to her :

Dear Mum,
How lucky am I ? I had two mum's, although growing up
I only really knew you.
I would be amiss if I didn't say thank you to you for everything.
I know at the end things weren'r as good as maybe
it should have been, but I always loved you..I hope
that it was the same for you.
I love you still...
If you were still here I would want to contact you to wish
you a Happy Mother's Day, but instead, I am
sending my wishes for you to Heaven.
Along with my wishes, I am sending lots of love.
Happy Mother's Day Mum

Mother's day is for this moment to have the courage
to let everything.... just be.........
I hope I have the courage...
Somewhere in this world there will be someone just like me..
Its okay to have a cry in the shower, where the
tears can be washed away

I choose ( no matter how hard ) to be happy
this day... no matter what...